Thursday, March 26, 2009

Ooops... so i havent' written on this in like amonth. Kind of a lot has happened too. Maybe I should just write on this more often. But then it turns out being like a chore... and nobody likes to do chores. Unless they are fun chores, like making cupcakes. Of course, that can be boring too. I went up to Duluth this past weekend and there was a lady at the grocery store decorating cakes all fancy and I stood and watched her with julia to keep her entertained. After julia asked me a hundred and one questions about what and why the lady was doing things, I said to the lady. You must really love your job. I can't imagine a more stress free fun job. Playing with frosting all day long. I think that is my true calling. After I said that the lady looked at me like I had just snorted a few envelopes worth of crack and said. 'No.' Whatever. I don't believe her. I want to own my own coffee shop with lots of cookies and snacks and play the lion king soundtrack and other fun things in the background and decorate cakes and make coffee alllll day long. Fanflippin tastic. Sarah. Read this blog and when you become a doctor save a bunch of money for us and we can do this. I'll just win the lotto maybe. Or marry a guy with end stage renal failure who is a millionaire. Word.
Hm. what else. I decided for a name for my car. La Fonda. Sometimes I call her Jane La Fonda. It's perfect. Exercise/ghetto. I was going to name her shaniqua, but it figured i would wait until I buy a big suv and put rim's on it. Maybe some blue lights, and a chandelier. Yeah. In summary, shaniqua will be my next car's name.
I also went to the cities in the last few weeks. I went to meet up with my old roomates from college and some other college friends. Later on in the night, we decided to go out to a bar. UGggghhhh. I don't know why I hate going to bars. Oh... wait. I do know. It's filled with gross guys between the ages of 21 and .. well, 21 and up. Who have had enough beers and usually aren't afraid to be over-the-top creepy and gross. Wonderful. My friends and I were at this bar in the cities.. I can't remember what it's called. We were all sitting at a table talking/laughing/having fun. Then this random guy came up and started hitting on michelle. But he left after a couple minutes. Then some other guy came... teresa's boyfriends friend from a while back.. or aquaintance. I wasn't really sure. All I know is that I was sitting next to little Katy. Then she got up.. and creeper sat down in her spot. He was so awkward. At first I didnt' even know if he knew corey becuase he wasn't really talking to him. The table we were sitting at was right next to the wall, which had a mirror on it and he would just keep looking into the mirror at himself. Then Little Katy came back and was just standing there with michelle waiting to sit down.. and he wouldn't get up. Then he started talking to me instead of Corey. Wang Wang wang. I don't even remember what we talked about. All I remember is that he smelled like old laundry, hemp, diapers, and a shit ton of cologne. After a while I just started to get angry. He was asking dumb questions like, 'how tall are you.' Then I said. I am a giant. Im almost 5'8. And he replied, Do you wear heels? 'Um, No. I don't.' and he said, 'good.'
what? Good. F U. I can wear heels if I want to. Then his friends kept coming up and they're like, 'hey, you should bring you date with us.'
Excuse me? Date? I've known you for like.. 8 minutes. Oh, I'm sorry. I must have forgotten. When a girl walks into a bar she has to leave her brain at the door. Too bad I left mine in. bitch. Then he kept asking me to go places with him. Like, Do you know where this random place is?

dude. I don't even know how to get back onto 94 from here, so if you could tell me that, it would be great. thanks. You can even come with me. I'll drop you off right b efore the exit. Just kidding. I wouldn't let you in my car.

Then he kept rubbing my back. He would be like, 'um, what were you saying?' and would lean in and rub my back. I wasn't talking. I was just breathing.
Then he said,' I'm not trying to be creepy, I'm just being friendly.'

Um. Stop touching me. I didn't want to take a shower for at least another 2 days, and now I will have to when I get home. Thanks a lot. Way to waste water. Jerk.

Then he tried to have me get up and dance with him. He was literally standing up and pulling my arms up asking me to dance. I was pretty irritated. I just kept saying No. His friends were sitting at the table behind us and I don't know if it was some plan to get me to go with them... I am still pretty confused about the whole thing. Maybe the dancing thing would have worked if we were in a DANCING bar. This was a people sit on chairs and TALK bar. He came up in front of me and tried to pick me up under my arms to get me to go dance with him. His fragranty fragrance of diaper laundry cologne was especially strong at this point in time. It smelled like you were walking past abercrombie and fitch on your left, and a huge pile of moth balls laundry dust poop on your right. Perfect balance. Meanwhile while he is trying to pull me off the table all my friends are just sitting there watching and looking at me like... what the hell is he doing? Becca just grabbed his arm and yelled. 'she has a boyfriend.' He just kept pulling. I was actually laughing because this was so ridicuous, and I kept pulling back. I was stronger than he was.. haha. what up. and I said. You can't move me. I'm bigger thn you. ' That must have done it because he left after that. Then he got his friends from the table next to us. And on the way out he looked at me and said,' nobody likes me.'

Nope. I sure as hell don't. What? Are you trying to make my pity you? You just tried to pull me up and make me dance with you in a non dancing bar. You also touched my back. Asshole.

Now I am irritated. I will have to go release my anger somehow. Except I'm sick. Guess it will be eating an orange. or maybe tea. or I'll throw the dog's squeaky... really fast..ly.. Okay. I have more to write about. Like an alcohol withdrawal guy that I took care of and gave over 200mg of ativan to in a 12 hour shift, who kicked me in the stomach. I will do that later.